Working Title: A Little Difference
by Scarab1
Summary: Repost of earlier story with some background added and some changes. Shinji was always depressed cause he was ignored as he grew up. What if Shinji wasn't ignored. Would Shinji be the same? Who knows?


Hey Hold Up PAY ATTENTION HERE: DISCLAIMER  
  
Neon Genesis Evangelion, otherwise referred to as Shin Seiki Evangelion, its character, ideas, story line, situations and plots, as well as all other intellectual property dealing with Neon Genesis Evangelion, belong to the developers and owners of the original series, Gainax and its affiliates, if any. I claim no rights or ownership to and of the name Neon Genesis Evangelion, characters, ideas, plot line, plot situations, or any of the intellectual property dealing with the Neon Genesis Evangelion. My purpose with the following is to create new situations for the characters of Evangelion for my enjoyment. I make no monetary or otherwise profit from this or any other stories dealing with Neon Genesis Evangelion. At the request of any of the owners of the copyrights to Neon Genesis Evangelion I will gladly remove this story and any others from any postings on the internet/World Wide Web.  
  
Okay, and just in case anyone complains, the name Seita come from "Grave of the Fireflies" while Takuma comes from "Initial D," both of which belong to the holders of the respective copy rights, I don't know off hand who they are though. But I see no reason anyone would complain as I don't believe a single name can be copyrighted, especially since many people probably use the name everyday when referring to people they deal with in the real world. In other words, you can't copyright a real person's name.  
  
As stated before, this is for fun and not for profit. Should anyone of the copyright holders complain, I will gladly remove this from the internet.  
  
- Scarab  
  
  
  
P.S. I'm a student, so I have very little money, or anything else of any value.  
  
  
  
Notes -  
  
Anyway, this is the beginning of an idea that I have had for a while, and have been slowly working on, school and all that. It its my attempt to have circumstances in Shinji's past that change him for the person that is seen in the canon. In order to do this, I felt that he and everyone else needed to be a couple years older, also for various reasons that will be later in the story as I have found that romantic relationships between fourteen year old children are quite unbelievable in many stories that I have seen them in. I also find them to be highly improbable, as fourteen year olds don't have to mental or emotional capacity to make that kind of bond. Having them be so young in my mind is also quite, distasteful. Plus I think sixteen would be about the age where a person could start understanding emotional relationships on a romantic level instead of just a platonic level.  
  
Shinji is supposed to have a stronger personality in this because of the circumstances in his past, but he is also supposed to have the same soft nature in him that he did in canon. While I realize that this is a poor example of where his softer nature might come out, I am trying to give Shinji a spine and a will to stand up to people and make them respect him, not make him bad ass or super tough and macho. I also tried to put a little of the standard teenager in him that didn't seem to be in the canon, though in the canon he was a fourteen/fifteen years old, so that might not have come out yet, except for the angst part. What I mean is a teenagers want to buck authority and make the world notice them. I hope that this is what I got across with Shinji's attitude, but I think I made him a little two strong in personality. But a person, especially a teenager can grow a great deal in two years, depending on the circumstances  
  
- Scarab  
  
Also, sorry in advance for any grammatical errors, grammar was always a weak point for me in school, while science was my strong point. I also must say that I will be writing this totally in English, except for names and a few words. I find it highly annoying when writers add phrases in other languages thinking it sounds smart, when its just a pain in the ass to read.  
  
  
  
Working Title: A little difference  
  
  
  
Gendo Ikari looked down at the small child that was crying on the sidewalk. He could not feel anything in his heart for what he was about to do, having long ago distanced himself from his emotions in order to further his own goals. Not even the slightest amount of regret or remorse. Ignoring the child's cries Gendo turned and walked away, not looking back, at the child that was his son. A four-year-old Shinji Ikari stood on the sidewalk where his father had to him to stay. In the house behind him were people that his father had told him were his aunt and uncle, but at present they were ignoring Shinji, feeling it was more appropriate that Shinji work this out on his own, rather than either of them stepping into to help Shinji understand.  
  
It was just after Gendo turned the corner at the end of the street, and coincidentally out of his life for the next twelve years, Shinji took off running after Gendo shouting for his papa to stop and wait for him.  
  
"FATHER, WHERE ARE YOU GOING? WAIT FOR ME!" Shinji rounded the same corner that Gendo had a couple of minutes earlier and looked for the familiar figure of his father. Not knowing any better, and wanting to find his father Shinji took off in a random direction. "PAPA WHERE ARE YOU?!"  
  
Not seeing his father around the next corner the four year old kept going, thinking his father would be just around the next. The fact that Shinji was just turning random directions was lost on the young child, as he still had no concept of such things. Shinji kept this up for an hour, completely exhausting himself in the process.  
  
Feeling tired, scared, hurt and hungry, Shinji sat down on the sidewalk where he found himself. Scrunching up into a ball with his back to a wall and his knees pulled up to his chest, Shinji started sobbing again. He couldn't understand why his papa had left him, what had he done wrong? He couldn't understand where his mother was. She hadn't come home. Shinji continued to cry on the sidewalk, passersby ignoring him as someone else's problem, and thinking by ignoring the crying child, it would go away.  
  
(Actually from what I have heard, from some people I know who have spent some time in Japan; this is a common way of thinking in Japan, when around common problems. Thinking by ignoring a problem it will go away since it is someone else's problem and they will take care of it. No wanting to stick their neck out and get involved in a situation. Correct me if I'm wrong)  
  
It was getting later in the day, the sun slowly starting to dip towards the horizon, the air slowly starting to cool down, even it if was late summer. Shinji still was huddled on the sidewalk, not knowing what to do, as most four year olds would do in such a situation. Through his Crying Shinji became aware of someone talking to him. Uncurling from his ball, Shinji turned his tear streaked face to whom ever was speaking to him. It was an older teenage boy, maybe late middle school, early high school in age.  
  
"Hey little guy, what's the matter?" The older boy had a friendly smile upon his face and a warm demeanor that attracted Shinji.  
  
Snuffling back his tears Shinji asked, "Have you seen my papa?"  
  
"I'm sorry I haven't seen him. Did you get separated from him?"  
  
"Nuhhuhh. Papa left me. Why did he leave me? What did I do to make him not like me anymore?"  
  
The expression on the teens face tightened for a second before he turned back to Shinji, understanding in his eyes. "Well, what about your mother?"  
  
"She never came home from work."  
  
The expression tightened some more. "What's your name little guy?"  
  
"Shinji."  
  
"Okay Shinji, I'm Seita Ishikawa. You want to be my friend?" At this point Seita guessed that Shinji needed a friend to help him. He had a feeling that what had happened to him as a child had just happened to Shinji. There was no way that the small child could be faking, not with how hard he had been crying.  
  
"You want to be my friend," asked a wonderstruck Shinji? Nobody had asked to him to be their friend before. He looked up at Seita with hope in his eyes.  
  
"Yes, I do." Seita could see the look in Shinji's eyes. Maybe Shinji wouldn't have as rough a time as he had if Shinji could still have hope in his eyes.  
  
"I want to be your friend to," answered Shinji somewhat happily. Shinji snuffled some more. "But I want my papa back. Why did papa leave me?"  
  
"Well Shinji, I can't tell you why. Do you live around here?"  
  
"Papa left me with people he told me to call Auntie and Uncle, but I don't where that is."  
  
"Do you have a family name Shinji?"  
  
"I . . Ikar . . . Ikari, that's it."  
  
"Well then, Shinji Ikari, lets go talk to my mother. She can help us find you family. You look pretty hungry. We can get something to eat too."  
  
"Okay." Shinji still sniffled somewhat, but he sounded eager at the prospect of having something to eat. Seita took Shinji's hand and pulled him up into a standing position. "Ready to go Shinji?"  
  
"Uh huh."  
  
Holding Shinji's hand, Seita turned in the direction of his house and began the slow walk back so that Shinji could keep up, being a small child.  
  
Seita's house was not all that far away from where he presently was with Shinji, but a quarter of the way there, Shinji was so tired that Seita bent down an let Shinji ride the rest of the way piggyback.  
  
Seita and his mother lived in a moderate house, what could be afforded on his mother pay check, Seita's father having walked out oh them when Seita was a young child much like Shinji. Seita learned later that his father had been a successful businessman, but when things had gone bad in his job, he had blamed Seita and his mother for his failures and had left them. While they weren't poor, they weren't rich either, but enjoyed a decent level of living, that allowed Seita to attend school instead of looking for work to help support them. Seita himself didn't know what exactly to do about Shinji, other than Shinji needed someone to care for him at this point in his life. Seita hoped his mother would know what do, especially since Shinji had been abandoned by his father.  
  
By the time Seita had reached home, Shinji had fallen asleep, emotionally and physically exhausted by the events of the day. So entering his home, Seita laid Shinji down on the couch and got a blanket to put over him. He was glad that his mother had been around after his father had left. Had he been put in the same situation as Shinji, well Seita didn't want to think about it.  
  
Going into the kitchen, he began to make dinner, like he always did, so that it would be ready when his mother got home from her hard day of work. She worked as a secretary for one of the larger businesses in the area and as such, heavy demands were made on her time to take care of many things for her employer.  
  
Seita had just finished dinner when he heard his mother come in the door. She was a woman of average height, and one could tell even as her face was stretched taunt by the stress of her job, she would have made a very pretty picture that would have turned heads. In her late thirties now, her face just beginning to showing the first laugh-lines around her eyes and mouth, she was still quite pretty.  
  
Seita called from the kitchen. "Hi mom, I'm in here!" Seita could here his mom throw her shoes in the coat closet, hang up her suit jacket, and slowly walk towards the kitchen, passing the living room along the way. Seita heard his mother's footsteps stop. "Seita, come here please."  
  
He didn't like his mother's tone of voice. Swallowing, and finding his mouth now suddenly dry, Seita steeled his nerves and went out to see what his mother had to say. Some how he hoped he could make her understand.  
  
Surprisingly, to Seita, his mother was very understanding about the whole situation, though it had taken him an hour to explain. Upset and a little confused about what to do, but understanding none the less. Most likely because of what Seita's father had done to them when Seita was little.  
  
Walking quietly into the living room, Seita sat down nest to Shinji's sleeping for and gently shook Shinji's shoulder to wake him. Shinji gave a loud yawn and slowly woke up. He looked around, confused as to where he was, and whom the boy was that was sitting next to him. "Seita, where am I?"  
  
"Hey Shinji, this is my house, where I live. Are you hungry?"  
  
"I'm so hungry I could eata whole horse by my self!"  
  
Seita smiled at the younger boy, as long as he was focused on something else other than his father at this point, Shinji would probably be fine, and that was probably best for the moment. "Well then, lets get some dinner and you can meet my mom."  
  
Lifting Shinji up, Seita carried him into the dining room and set him on a cushion so that Shinji could reach the top of the table. Seita's mother Kyoko sat across from him, and looked at Shinji, as if trying to decide what to do next.  
  
The Ishikawa's did find Shinji's Aunt and Uncle, who while grateful for having found Shinji and gotten him home, couldn't really deal with caring for a small child, especially having none of their own, preferring instead to focus on their careers and not be tied down with children and the demands of time and money that children created, not to mention the emotional input needed. All of which Shinji's aunt and Uncle couldn't provide, or were unwilling to provide at that point. So after some agreement on both sides, out of court, Shinji was going to stay with the Ishikawa's, who would provide care for Shinji. In return, the Ishikawa's received the money that was given to Shinji's aunt and uncle by Gendo, as well as some extra, provided by Shinji's aunt an uncle as a 'fee' for taking care of Shinji. But more importantly, the Ishikawa's received a new family member, who had already endeared himself in their hearts, who they wanted to help.  
  
Years passed; as time was want to do and Shinji grew older and began attending grade school. She was still a shy boy, not wanting to get to know anybody outside his immediate foster family for fear of being hurt again. Shinji did not understand it this way but his family could tell what was going on with him. Shinji did well in school, but was never interested in much that happened around him in school, preferring instead to spend his time alone listening to music. As Shinji neared the sixth grade, Seita was especially worried about Shinji. When his father had walked out on him Seita had retreated into himself somewhat, but at least by sixth grade he had at least one good friend.  
  
Seita found it hard to do anything, though, as he had graduated high school and began attending University. While he tried to visit Shinji as much as he could, performing well in University was a stressful experience and he didn't really have all that much free time. He knew of Shinji's interest in music since being a small boy, but couldn't think of anything he could get Shinji interested in that would help him make friends, or at least have somewhat of a social life. At least, by the time he went to University Shinji was old enough to understand that he wasn't being abandoned by Seita. Shinji had yet to really work past the experience of his father abandoning him at a young age.  
  
It was almost time for school's to let out for summer vacation when a chance conversation with a friend at the University lead Seita to an idea that he hoped would help Shinji.  
  
"Come on Takuma, do you have to flirt with every hot girl that you see? We're gonna be late for the cram session!"  
  
"Gotta make up for lost time man. I couldn't have done this in high school no matter how hard I tried. I was rather shy then," Takuma had a funny grin on his face while he answered.  
  
"You, Takuma, the great flirt, not outgoing?! I don't believe you for a minute!"  
  
Takuma was a friend that Seita had made in one of University classes. Takuma laughed, "Ha, you should have seen me in grade and middle school. I couldn't talk to anyone much less a girl without blushing and stammering incoherently."  
  
"So what did it for you? I mean, you certainly don't have that problem now." Seita was curious. Not for himself, but maybe he could help Shinji finally start coming out of his self imposed shell.  
  
"What are you so interested for, it's not like you have any trouble with the girls."  
  
"Not for me, it for my brother, you know who I'm talking about. Well he's never been that comfortable around anybody, except for me and mom. I was trying to find a way to help him, I dunno, get out, meet some people, have a fun time instead of sitting around our house all day. He went through basically what I went through, but he's never really come out of the shell he's built around himself. Just worried about him I guess."  
  
Takuma grew quiet for a minute. While he had never gone through what Seita had told him Shinji had gone through, he could appreciate how messed up that could make a person. "Well, in that case, give him something he can be confident in that nobody can ever take away from him. That's what worked for me."  
  
"Something to give him confidence, hmmm...." That got Seita to thinking.  
  
A couple weeks before school was finally over for the summer, Seita took Shinji with him to the University for the final performance of the University orchestra. He hoped that Shinji would have a fun time since it was a type of music that Shinji really enjoyed, but Seita was surprised when Shinji couldn't take his eyes off the cellos.  
  
After the concert Seita asked Shinji why he liked the cello's so much. Shinji had to think for a minute before answering. "I like them because, they sound nice and make me feel good."  
  
That summer, Seita took Shinji to a music shop where, unbeknownst to Shinji, some of the money that was provided by "Gendo" they rented a cello to fit Shinji's size and Shinji started to learn to play a musical instrument. Taking Shinji to weekly lessons got to be something Seita and Kyoko enjoyed. It was nice to see Shinji open up to someone about something, anything, other than them. The only problem was, to Shinji that the music never sounded right. When his instructor asked him why, Shinji had responded that every time he played the cello he found himself getting angry. "Why doesn't the music sound right to you Shinji?"  
  
"It sounds different than the music I heard at the concert."  
  
"Well, you know ever instrument sounds just a little bit different than every other instrument of the same kind, right Shinji."  
  
"Yeah I know that but that's not it."  
  
"Hmm. What did you feel when the cello's played in concert Shinji?"  
  
"I felt peaceful and happy."  
  
"And what do you feel when you play?"  
  
"I always feel, I don't know, angry I guess."  
  
"And why do you feel angry?"  
  
"My . . . . . my father."  
  
It was after this session, that Seita and Kyoko finally sat down with Shinji and tried to help him understand why his father had done what he had done. Shinji was only twelve at the time, so he really didn't quite grasp the totality of the situation, but he understood one thing that Seita had said. His father was a coward for running away from his family and his responsibilities, just as Seita's father had was for what he had done. That was the one thing that Shinji took to heart most of all from that conversation, and promised himself that he wouldn't be like his father. He wouldn't be coward and run from his responsibilities.  
  
That day was a major turning point in Shinji's life. Had he continued the way he was he might have turned out depressed and meek, unable to deal with the world around him. But as he had people who cared for him and helped him understand, especially that things weren't his fault, Shinji started facing up to the world and dealt with the bumps in life more directly, rather than running away or shutting the world out.  
  
Two more years passed. Shinji turned fourteen and finished up his last year of middle school. He was still a shy person, who didn't speak up very much. But that was mostly due to lingering anger about his father, and possibly some feeling intimidate by the other students who were much louder than him. Also, not having taken part in any after school sports activities, preferring rather to play his cello, Shinji was a rather scrawny kid.  
  
It was that year that Seita introduced Shinji to the gym. Seita had been going ever since he started high school, mostly because it was something to do with friends. He hoped Shinji could gain the same confidence he had from some strength training. Shinji found himself enjoying working out at the gym, after the initial soreness had worn off, and the feeling of strength it brought. Of course if could also be that Shinji was becoming more comfortable and confident with himself as he grew. Several weeks after this began though, two events happened that turned Shinji's world upside-down.  
  
Shinji came back to what he considered his home after school and going to the gym, as had become a normal routine for him when Seita wasn't home visiting. He did some of his homework, and started looking around the kitchen for something to make for dinner. Not seeing anything that he really wanted, Shinji put his shoes on and headed out to the local market, unaware that four people were watching him. Two men in black trench coats in one car. A well dressed man and woman in another car. Neither set of watchers was aware of the other.  
  
Blissfully unaware, Shinji, being lost in his music, continued to the market, did the shopping and went back home. Shinji set about making dinner, just finishing when Kyoko returned home at the same time she always did.  
  
It was getting late in the evening, dinner long over and the dishes done. Shinji was in his bedroom, having just finished up his homework and studying and was warming up on his cello. Kyoko was reading the daily newspaper and relaxing. The doorbell rang. Kyoko got up and answered the door.  
  
Shinji's playing was interrupted by loud voices coming from the downstairs portion of the house. Carefully setting down his bow and cello, he made his way down to see who his mother was arguing with. It certainly wouldn't have been anyone he knew. Last time this happened it was Seita's father, completely drunk, who had come barging into the house and had tried to drag Seita off with him. Seita's father was probably still in prison, and from the sound of the voices it wasn't him.  
  
When he reached the main hallway, where the font door was situated, he caught sight of Kyoko arguing with a man and woman, too well dressed, so it wasn't anyone they knew. The arguing stopped.  
  
Kyoko turned towards Shinji. He didn't like the expression on her face; it meant something bad was going to happen. "Shinji, meet your father's brother and his wife, Mr. and Mrs. Rokubungi."  
  
Shinji's eyes grew hard. He stared at the man, who started looking decidedly uncomfortable. Gendo's brother and Gendo looked quite similar, both of about the same height and hair color. Both had a narrow face with a sharply pointed nose and bushy eyebrows, same calculating eyes. The only differences were, that Gendo's brother was decidedly fatter than Gendo, having a somewhat prominent potbelly of a person used to a lazy lifestyle, he was also balding and didn't have a beard. Shinji greeted them in a cold voice. "Hello, Aunt . . . Uncle."  
  
The conversation that followed was very unpleasant for Shinji and Kyoko. The Rokubungi's were expecting to just come and pick Shinji up to be an already raised "son" for them and for Shinji to like it. Shinji sure as hell wasn't about to go with these people, especially his father's brother, and Kyoko wasn't about to let him go, or the Rokubungi's take Shinji. And the Rokubungi's weren't about to take no for an answer, being somewhat rich, were used to getting whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted it. In the end, the Rokubungi's left, promising legal action. Shinji was scared of what was happening, Kyoko was in tears, having Shinji, a boy she thought of as her own son, having the threat of him being taken away hanging over her head.  
  
It took several weeks, but in the end the courts decided that Shinji's biological family mattered more and the Ishikawa's were ordered to give Shinji up. It probably also had to do with the fact that the Rokubungi's had more money though what they did with it was not mentioned. So Shinji was uprooted from the only home he had ever known and dragged off to his aunt and uncles, who wanted him to play obedient dutiful son. Shinji's hate towards aunt and uncle grew as well as his now consuming hate for his father. Feeling such a way will defiantly cause a person to act differently, so Shinji was anything but what his aunt and uncle wanted. The only good thing was the small gym that was installed in his aunt and uncles house. The first time he went to use it he could tell that the equipment had never been used, his relatives being lazy people. In one corner stood a full size sand filled punching bag.  
  
Shinji stood in his room the day he had been dragged to his Aunt and Uncle's. The only mother he had ever known was now somewhere else, a crying distraught mess, who was presently being comforted by Seita. For that alone Shinji couldn't forgive his aunt and uncle. Said aunt and uncle were presently sitting in their lounge room, drinking sake and no doubt gloating over their success in court. Several weeks passed. Shinji hadn't been able to get away to see his mother or even call since his aunt and uncles were always around when he wasn't in his room, and Shinji defiantly didn't want them to listen into his conversation as he guessed they would.  
  
It was a simple summons that started it. A summons for Shinji from Gendo saying, "Come." While Shinji could deal with that, it was the dismissal that came a day later that made his hate for the Rokubungi family boil up again. All the second letter had said was "you are not needed." After that Shinji took solace in trying to beat the snot out of the punching bag every day when he got home from school until he was exhausted, physically and emotionally. While punching the bag Shinji would picture everyone he presently hated and get him self so worked up into a rage that any one who knew Shinji before being dragged off to his aunt and uncles would never have recognized him. Eventually he would collapse in the gym and sleep until he could drag himself up and into bed.  
  
While his aunt and uncle didn't really care all that much about Shinji, other than keeping him around as a model son, and doing what Gendo had asked, they did care about the image they portrayed to other people, and Shinji beating his hands raw while working himself to exhaustion on the punching bag just wouldn't do for them, or their image. So, instead of dealing with the problem themselves, they asked Shinji's school counselor to talk to Shinji about his problems.  
  
A year passed, then two and Shinji was sixteen. He had started his second year in high school. He was still an excellent student, and he also participated in the school orchestra, being seated as second cello. Shinji still lived with his aunt and uncle. They had come to an understanding though after that session with his school counselor. If they left him alone, he wouldn't bother them, and that suited Shinji fine. He spent most of his time at what he considered his home, with Kyoko, sometimes not going back to his aunt and uncles for a week. He still went to the gym. He still tried to beat the snot out of various punching bags when he worked out in the gym. No more what Shinji the scrawny and shy little boy he once was. Now, thanks to the weightlifting and using the punching bag, Shinji had gown into a handsome young man with a slightly sculpted body. Shinji was still shy though, but nice to everyone, except people in the Rokubungi family, unless you looked closely and then one could see slowly simmering rage and hate towards his blood relatives and his father. With his adopted family this was never seen, as with any real family. Sometimes a person got angry, but never the long burning hate towards the Rokubungi's. Shinji Kyoko and Seita had grown to deal with the situation as best as they could, though it was still painful for them, they made the best they could of the situation.  
  
It was during the second year that Shinji had lived with the Rokubungi's and a few months after Shinji had turned sixteen, when a second summons came from Gendo, this time with an ident card, having a picture of a fourteen year old Shinji on it and some instructions of where to go and who would be picking him up. Shinji had taken a look at the summons which like the previous one just said "Come," and promptly ripped it up tossing the pieces all over his floor, then headed into the gym, and like when he first arrived at his aunt and uncles, attempted to beat the snot out of the punching bag until he was exhausted.  
  
Shinji had only been punching the bag for about half and hour when his aunt had come in, the summons in her hand, having taped it back together. She had then demanded to know what was going on. Shinji had told her simply that he didn't care what his father wanted, as his father was to much of a coward to face up to him as a child, and that he wasn't going. From there, what had started out as an interrogation of Shinji turned into a rather loud argument about respecting ones elders and how Shinji was going whether he wanted to or not.  
  
Shinji's aunt was speaking. "Have the decency to respect your elders as they deserve. You will follow these instructions and go to you father as a respectful son!"  
  
Shinji answered. "Why should I? My father just abandoned me when he felt like it. Why should I be respectful to that?! I was his son for god's sake! And what gives you the right to tell me what to do, you didn't raise me, you weren't my parents for me, why should I respect you and your wishes when you didn't respect mine and my families when you took me from them and the only home I had ever known?!!" Shinji was getting up into a rage now. The summons from his father had brought back his feeling full force, and while he was trying to deal with them, his aunt had to come and argue with him.  
  
"Shinji, how dare you say such a thing?! We made sure you were raised properly and you turned into this, this, uncultured barbarian." Shinji's uncle made his appearance at this point, wanting to know what all the shouting was about.  
  
"Here now, what's going on here? What is the meaning of this? Shinji?" Shinji's aunt showed the summons to his uncle and informed him of the situation.  
  
Shinji really didn't appreciate the conversation that followed. Basically it consisted of his aunt and uncle telling Shinji in no uncertain terms what he would and would not do and Shinji telling them in no uncertain terms just exactly what he wasn't going to do. It finally ended when Shinji told the Rokubungi's exactly what he felt about them, his father and what they were trying to do. "You think you have the right to tell me what I should feel and what I should do!? Did you raise me? Did you even try before handing me off to someone else to care for me? Did you even try to stop my father from what he was doing when he abandoned me? Can you say yes to any of that? Didn't think so. You have no right to tell me how to act and feel. I don't care what you want, AND I CARE EVEN LESS WHAT MY FATHER WANTS!!" Turning and stomping out of the room, Shinji left an indignant and angry aunt and a contemplative uncle. If one looked close enough they could have seen a glimmer of respect for Shinji in his uncle's eyes, even if he was angry at Shinji for what Shinji had said to them.  
  
The next morning came, seeing Shinji, his bags packed, cello case among them, walking out of his aunt and uncles house, never looking back, before his aunt or uncle were even awake. As the summons date wasn't for another week, Shinji took the chance to visit the only mother he had ever known, to see if she could help him decide what to do.  
  
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A sixteen-year-old Shinji stood outside of a train station waiting for the person who was supposed to have been there some fifteen minutes before to pick him up. He had come to this city on the summons of his father. The same one he had gotten two years ago, and then just as quickly had gotten notice that he wasn't "needed." All it said was "Come." Nothing else. No reason or explanation. Just "Come." Shinji had decided to come after talking with Kyoko. He had finally understood his need to confront his father, and that was all he was here to do. At first he was going to ignore the summons, but Kyoko had convinced him otherwise. Shinji hoped his decision was the right one, confronting his father instead of letting the past die and just carry on with life.  
  
Huffing an exasperated sigh, the Shinji sat down on the curb and took out the information he had also received with the summons on the person who was supposedly supposed to be picking him up. Included had been a picture of her, standing bent over the front of her car in short shorts and a small spaghetti string top, holding her hand out in a victory sign. He idly noted that the note written on the picture "P.S. Note the cleavage" was in his opinion not necessary as that was probably one of the first things he had noticed about the woman in the picture, after her face. The other probably would have been the weird, spaced out looking penguin next to her. The Shinji could have sworn that the penguin had to have been stoned when the picture was taken.  
  
Now most people, men in particular would have noticed the woman's cleavage right away, and so did Shinji. But unlike many, he really didn't dwell on such physical attributes all that much. Sure he liked people who looked nice, but in all he was more worried about the personality of the people he dealt with, mostly to see whether they would eventually betray him in some way. But Shinji was after all a teenage boy, and with that came the raging hormones and mood swings that all people had to go through at that awkward stage of life.  
  
Letting out another deep and heart felt sigh at the injustice of the world, the Shinji cleared his throat and hawked the lugie out into the street, just in time to barely miss the blue Renault that was just pulling up. The driver being the woman who's picture he was presently holding. The teen stood up as the woman got out of the car and looked at him over the hood. She looked just like she had in the picture only she was wearing a tight black dress that was rather short in Shinji's opinion and wearing a somewhat large metal cross that hung down to her chest. Pulling off the sunglasses she was wearing, the woman spoke.  
  
"Shinji Ikari?"  
  
"Yeah, that's me," Shinji answered in a slightly annoyed voice. Well who wouldn't be after receiving such a summon from a father he wanted nothing to do with and then having to wait an extra half hour just to be picked up. Its not like he had gone walking around the city so nobody could find him. He had stayed right at the station.  
  
The woman, if she noticed that Shinji was annoyed, ignored it. "Misato Katsuragi. Hop in."  
  
Shinji opened the passenger side door and tossed his small overnight bag and backpack onto the back seat of the car, only checking to make sure that his Mp3 player was still in his pocket, got in the car.  
  
Two years ago Shinji might have just sat apathetically in the car and listened to Misato prattle on about stuff, as it would have been a distraction from his feelings towards the Rokubungi's and his father. What she was talking about he didn't know, since he had his earphones on and his music turned up loud. Shinji really didn't care what Misato was talking about, too absorbed in his music. Shinji's self imposed solitude was interrupted when Misato yanked his earphones off.  
  
"Owww!" Shinji rubbed is abused ears.  
  
"Were you even paying attention to a thing I was saying?"  
  
Shinji was still nursing his ear. "Huh? What did you want?"  
  
'I guess that answers that question,' thought Misato. "Nothing, never mind . . .. HOLY SHIT!!!!"  
  
Misato suddenly swerved the car to the left just in time to miss the giant green foot that slammed into the pavement. The impact of the foot was followed by the roar of rockets being shot at the monstrosity by the swarms of V-TOL craft that surrounded it. Shinji extracted his head from the dashboard and hadn't a clue what to make of the situation.  
  
"What the HELL is THAT!!?!" Shinji was just a 'little' bit surprised  
  
Misato didn't answer right away. She was too busy throwing her car into reverse, spinning it around and taking off away from the green monstrosity before they could get stepped on, or blown up, as a surface-to-surface missile screamed overhead towards the green being. It put up a three- clawed hand and caught the missile, causing the missile to rip apart before it exploded in the things 'face.'  
  
Once Misato got herself turned around and driving away from the thing she didn't stop until they had reached one of the hillsides surrounding Tokyo- 3. Pulling to a stop Misato got out a pair of binoculars and leaned out the car window to look at the continuing battle. Of course this afforded Shinji a rather nice view of Misato's shapely posterior, to which his face got somewhat red. Looking down at his pants his face got even redder. Shinji adjusted his pants, which had become rather tight across the front, and crossed his legs, and again preceded to tune out the world through his headphones, though he was still quite curious in what the green thing the army seemed to be battling was.  
  
A sudden cry of "SHIT!!" came from Misato.  
  
The next thing Shinji knew, Misato had tackled him to the floor of the car and they were being flipped end over end. They came to rest with he car on its top, with Misato and Shinji tangled up inside.  
  
"Uggh. What hit us?" Shinji wasn't feeling that well at the moment. Being spun around like that, and inside a car had made him rather dizzy.  
  
"N2 mine. The UN dropped a N2 mine on that thing for Christ sake. What the hell were they thinking? They can't hurt it with that."  
  
"Uhh, Miss Misato. What exactly is 'it'"?  
  
Misato and Shinji got themselves untangled and squirmed out of the car windows.  
  
"That is an angel. A being sent to destroy mankind. That's what NERVE was created for. Now come on and help me push." Misato was looking out at the green monstrosity that was now standing still, its skin seeming to be partially melted.  
  
Shinji and Misato both got their backs under the car and managed to turn it over. It was a walk back into the city to appropriate some batteries before they were on the way again.  
  
"Isn't taking those batteries stealing?" Shinji was a little skeptical about just taking the batteries, at least without leaving a note.  
  
Misato gave a laugh. "Hehehe, well it is a war and we needed a working car so everything will be alright, m'kay? Okay."  
  
"Somehow I don't think anyone will believe that"  
  
"Grrr, well you aren't as cute as I though you would be."  
  
"And you aren't as mature as you really should be."  
  
"Hey! Grrrrrr." 'That little . .. . . ooooh!' Misato developed an irritated expression  
  
Both Misato and Shinji shut up after that each lost in their own thoughts, or in Shinji's case his music. Misato though was busy worrying about how to get the stains out of her favorite dress, how much it was going to cost to get her car fixed, which incidentally she still has nine more payments on, and what was going on with the angel. She gave a long-suffering sigh. Picking up a folder next to her seat, Misato tossed it onto Shinji's lap telling him to read it, and asking if he had his ident card, which Shinji, after fishing around in his backpack, handed to her.  
  
It took another half hour for them to reach the Geofront housing NERVE's base of operations. This impressed Shinji a great deal though he had trouble believing that the huge cavern was man made. Once they finally got out of the car, Misato promptly got lost in the maze of corridors and evaluators that made of the NERVE complex. When Shinji calmly and un- interestedly pointed out that they had passed the same way twice now, Misato finally broke down and called Dr. Ritsuko Akagi. Once they had been found, and Misato had been scolded for interrupting her, Dr. Akagi addressed Shinji.  
  
"So this is the Third Child."  
  
"Yes, Shinji Ikari, meet Dr. Ritsuko Akagi."  
  
Shinji was still paging through the standard new employee's handbook for NERVE. "Huh? Oh, Pleased to meet you Dr. Akagi."  
  
"Likewise." Ritsuko turned back to Misato. Shinji put his earphones back on but didn't turn them up all that much so he could hear, and turned away to look to see where they were going.  
  
"He's not very much like the records say he is. Of course those were made two years ago, so anything could have happened that would have caused him to change. Shinji seems to not be as passive or depressed as the reports say."  
  
"Hmmmm, we'll just have to see if it's a good thing or a bad thing when the time comes."  
  
"I am right here you know. I can hear everything your saying." Shinji found it annoying when people talked about him like he wasn't there. Just because he was quiet didn't mean that he wasn't listening. He'd put up with enough of it while living at his uncle's place to know that if you embarrassed someone about it while they were doing it, they usually stopped, until the next time they did it.  
  
"......." Neither woman had a response to that.  
  
"So is it working yet?" Asked Misato.  
  
"We're working on the O - nine system, meaning there's a zero point zero- zero-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero-nine percent chance of us succeeding. Answered Ritsuko.  
  
"So there really no chance of it working?"  
  
"Please, its the o-nine system, as in oni, a Japanese devil. It will to work."  
  
Then they finally arrived at a darkened doorway, which all three walked through.  
  
Shinji was a little startled when all the lights suddenly disappeared. "Wah! Who turned out the lights?" The lights came on. "Ahhh, what the Hell is that!!?"  
  
"That is Artificial Human Evangelion, Unit One. Mankind's last line of defense against the angels." Answered Ritsuko. As if on queue a blast was heard from above ground that rocked the chamber they were presently in.  
  
"So this is Gendo's work then?" Asked Shinji. He refused to call Gendo father anymore.  
  
"That is correct." Gendo Ikari's voice came from a small platform overlooking the Evangelion unit one. "It's been awhile."  
  
"Yeah, well, not nearly long enough for me," Shinji sighed. "I suppose you have some reason for me to be here, or you wouldn't have summoned me."  
  
"You will pilot it," was Gendo's self-assured reply.  
  
Misato was shocked. "But sir, he just got here, it took Rei seven months just to sync. There's no way he could possibly . . . ." Both parties ignored her, focused solely on each other.  
  
"Huh? You want me to pilot this thing!" Shinji had no small amount of incredulity in his voice as he pointed to Eva unit one. "I'm not getting in anything you had a hand in helping build. Who knows what it would do. Oh wait, yes I do. It killed my mother. Cause you were in too much of a hurry to finish it and proclaim your own greatness and didn't take correct safety precautions." Shinji was angry now, he did know that the last time he saw his mother was the day she had gone into the thing, but Shinji really didn't know if the last part was true, but it seemed to fit with his image of Gendo. Shinji struggled to reign in his anger. Misato and Ritsuko gasped at what Shinji said, and to the commander at that.  
  
"ENOUGH!" Gendo barked. "Either you will pilot it or humanity will cease to exist." Another blast from the angel above shook the chamber, harder this time.  
  
"And I should believe you because. . . . ? You were never a father for me, you never taught me anything. Your older brother was more of a father to me than you ever were and all he did was rip me away from the only family I knew. Hell, the only thing you ever taught me was never to trust you after you walked out on me when I was four and crying because my mother had just died. So tell me why I should believe such a cowardly man as you, who couldn't even face his own child! You coward!!" Shinji was shouting by the end. Misato and Ritsuko could only stare in wonder at Shinji as he shouted at the Commander of NERVE with no fear, as only a teenager could. Not to mention the fact that none of this had been mentioned in Shinji's files as well as the fact that Gendo was doing nothing to deny it.  
  
Gendo turned around and spoke to the older man standing in the room behind him. "Fuyutski, wake Rei."  
  
"Are you sure she can do it," responded Gendo's second in command?  
  
"She's not dead yet," Was Gendo's callus reply.  
  
Shinji stood and watched Gendo converse with someone, figuring that Gendo was up to something to get him to pilot the monstrous Eva that was before him. He wasn't about to let Gendo push him into anything though. If Gendo wanted Shinji to do something he would have to ask, and respect Shinji's decision and more importantly Shinji himself. When his uncle started respecting him as a man that day they argued and Shinji had stood up for himself, it was a piece in a puzzle that Shinji needed to become the person he was today. Once one person respected you, you couldn't go back to the way you were, otherwise you would loose that respect for all time. So here he was, Shinji Ikari, facing his father, and not backing down or showing fear, forcing Gendo to acknowledge his existence and who he was.  
  
Gendo turned around and spoke to Shinji again, playing his second to last trump card. "If you do not pilot, I have no use for you."  
  
Shinji's only response was, "So? You think I care what you think? I couldn't give a rat's ass about you. I have a father and you aren't him. I have a family that I can got back to any time." There Shinji had done it, he had gotten ride of deep-seated need to show Gendo that he wasn't a small helpless child anymore, which could be told what to do.  
  
Gendo was annoyed, no more than annoyed, he was angry. Shinji wasn't the person he was supposed to be, that he had intended Shinji to be, which was a meek boy who couldn't make up his mind, or stand up for himself. Turning back to Fuyutski, Gendo ordered Rei brought in and Dr. Akagi to over-write Shinji's data with Rei's in the Evangelion.  
  
Shinji turned too look as the sound of the squeaky wheels of a medical gurney came thought one of the doors to the Eva holding cage. Shinji could only stare, with pity in his eyes, at the girl who was on the gurney. She looked to be about his age and was covering in bandages, some covering half her face. Her arm was wrapped in a splint and there were bandages around her abdomen. She had blue hair and the most piercing red eyes that Shinji had ever seen, the only naturally red eyes that he had seen.  
  
Gendo spoke. "Rei, you will do it again."  
  
A quiet, "Yes Sir" was the only response as the girl, now identified as Rei tried, slowly to rise from the gurney she was on. Shinji was rather impressed she could force herself to move considering the pain Rei must have been in. He walked over to the gurney and helped her sit up; she only let out a small sound at the pain. He looked into Rei's one good eye, and made a hard decision. Another blast could be heard, closer than the last one.  
  
Ritsuko shouted, "It's found us, it must sense us down here!" Technicians and other responsible people began scrambling around, making the Evangelion ready to combat the angel.  
  
Shinji looked up at Gendo. 'So you really do need a pilot, and that badly huh?' There was a rumbling crash as some of the supports above the walkway gave way from the repeated blasts the city above was taking. Shinji had just enough time to pick up Rei (he was now quite thankful for his weight lifting) and tumble out of the way of the falling girders. What was a surprise to everyone present though was that none of the girders hit the walkway. A giant purple hand pulled out of its restraints and hovered protectively over Shinji and Rei, until the danger was past, the quietly slipped back under the surface of the liquid the Eva was standing in. Rei still only let out a small squeak of pain.  
  
Shinji stood up, holding Rei in his arms, the gurney no longer useful for lying on as it had been crushed bay the girders. Determination burned in his eyes "Okay, you got a pilot for this once, and only this once. What do I need to do?" Misato smiled, proud of Shinji's decision, if somewhat confused at his sudden change of heart.  
  
Next thing Shinji knew he was being settled into a long white tube, which had a seat and some controls in it. In Shinji's mind it looked like a giant white tampon. The top closed and he could feel it being inserted into the Evangelion. A picture display came up to one side with Misato and Ritsuko's face on it. Ritsuko spoke. "Okay Shinji, just try and relax, were filling the entry plug up with LCL. It may feel a little weird at first, but try to breath normally."  
  
Shinji held his breath for as long as possible before finally letting go and breathing in his first lungful of LCL. He gagged at the taste and the feel as his lung filled up with the cool liquid, fighting the urge to throw up. He could hear techs in the background shouting out things as Misato told him they were going to try and sync him with the Evangelion. Shinji could also feel another presence enter his mind as the process continued. It was animal like, bestial, with an insatiable appetite for blood, and a need to fight, to destroy ones enemies, those that dared to enter its territory. Shinji had to fight not to let the feeling take over him.  
  
In the command center, Ritsuko and the techs looked over the status of Shinji's sync with the Eva and Misato looked on. "Forty one percent. And on his first try. That's amazing. It just might work." Ritsuko was mumbling things to herself. Misato looked at the sick face Shinji was making at the LCL. "Hang in there Shinji, we're almost done." It was then that Shinji and the rest of the bridge crew noticed something. Shinji couldn't speak. Since there was no air in the entry tube, there was no way for Shinji's vocal cords to vibrate air molecules and produce sound, liquids were to thick to do this. Shinji couldn't talk. Had he been wearing a plug suit, which had a built in sub-vocalizer so that the pilots could speak in the LCL he could have spoken, not, in just his plain street clothes, Shinji was effectively mute. So Shinji settled for weak thumbs up and waited for instructions. Misato turned around and ordered Eva unit one to the launch gantry and to prepare for launch. Gendo watched all this passively through his usual cold-hearted stare. Ritsuko turned back to Shinji. "Just concentrate on walking when you get to the surface. Think what you want the Eva to do and it will respond." Shinji could only nod his head.  
  
Ritsuko turned a questioning stare to Gendo, who gave a slight nod of his head. Turning she nodded to Misato, who hoping this would all turn out alright, shouted, "EVA Launch!!"  
  
  
  
While I do not believe that this is all that similar to anyone else's stories, since pretty much any story dealing with Neon Genesis Evangelion should have some sort of confrontation between Shinji and his father at the beginning, if you feel that I have some how managed to make this too much like one of your stories I will gladly listen to your complaints.  
  
-Scarab 


End file.
